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Written 3 days ago
[b]Scott Pilgrim vs. The World™: The Game – Steam Review[/b]
Well, I’m a fan of the movie, so I’ve always wanted to try the game. A few years ago, when it came out, it was way overpriced compared to other beat’em ups, and the reviews were pretty bad...
Now, years later, the game finally dropped to a fair price and had better reviews, so — since I’m trying to convert my girlfriend into my Player 2 — I bought it to play exclusively with her.
I installed it, pressed play, and then the first issue hit:
[i]Ubisoft Connect[/i] installed itself on my system [b]without permission or confirmation[/b]. No prompt, no choice — it just appeared, took a few minutes, and then launched the game.
Honestly? I’m really fed up with this kind of practice. Companies like Ubisoft, EA, and others are notorious for being anti-consumer: overpriced games, incomplete releases, bugs, and now this — forced secondary launchers.
[b]If the game is on Steam, why do I need another launcher to play it?[/b]
After this unwanted "bonus" software finished its job, the game launched — but almost completely [i]muted[/i]. I restarted it, tried different settings — nothing helped. Maybe some third-party DRM issue, maybe a bug. Who knows. Let’s just play...
The menu is cute, the intro is faithful to the movie, and the character selection looks good...
But as I expected — that’s where the faithfulness ends.
The soundtrack? [b]Absolutely nothing like the film.[/b] Just random 1-minute chiptunes looping endlessly. You get tired of them in less than five minutes... and they [i]never[/i] stop.
The gameplay? It actually hurts your hands. Combos feel weird and disconnected, there are invisible or poorly placed objects all over the screen — they trap you and the enemies constantly. Combo-wise, you’re stuck with just [b]XXX or Y[/b] — that’s it. Such wasted potential.
[i]"But combos unlock as you level up!"[/i] — Sorry, no. Basic combos should be there from the start. Gating core mechanics like [i]blocking[/i] behind level-ups is absurd.
And the game is [b]incredibly repetitive[/b]. The enemies have way too much HP — [b]they just won’t die[/b]. It takes forever to bring down even basic grunts. They also take half a minute to get up after being knocked down, and you can’t really do anything while they’re on the floor — even dash attacks do laughable damage and just prolong their time down, when ironically, you deal more damage when they’re standing.
And then, someone apparently thought it was a genius idea to let you use enemies as weapons. So in most combos, you end up grabbing an enemy by accident and throwing them, which resets their state and delays their death even more.
[b]It's frustrating by design.[/b]
Let’s talk about the AI. The enemies? They aren’t exactly smart. But if they land a single hit, you get locked in a combo and might as well say goodbye to your health bar.
[i]"It's a skill issue, dodge better, you'll unlock defense later!"[/i] — So let me get this straight: I have to grind easy levels just to unlock the ability to [i]not[/i] get stunlocked? Come on.
There’s also an issue — which is [b]probably a bug[/b], because, well, it's Ubisoft — where even with friendly fire disabled, thrown objects can still hurt your teammate. You can even accidentally [i]grab your friend[/i], use them as a weapon, and kill them by mistake.
[b]Who thought that was a good idea?[/b] I’ve never seen anything like this in my life. It’s absurd.
Every screen transition gives the enemies an unfair advantage — they’re already active while you’re stuck in a transition animation. Entering or exiting shops mid-fight? Expect to eat a punch the second you step out.
And then there are vehicles treated as enemies. If it’s your first time on a stage, or you just don’t remember what’s coming, you’ll lose lives in the cheapest way possible. The game isn’t here to entertain you like the movie — [b]it’s here to punish you[/b], whether it’s your fault or not.
Alright, enough complaints. The [i]one[/i] thing I kind of liked was the nerdy references — like Mario-style world maps and star levels — but even that was overdone. The enemies? All over the place. Aliens? Bats? [i](Why is it always bats?)[/i] Robots, zombies, guns... seriously?
As AVGN once said: [i]"Why are there bats in every game that doesn’t need them?"[/i]
This movie was already structured like a video game. All they had to do was adapt it with care.
But no — even that, they managed to mess up.
In the end, the only thing I liked wasn’t even that good.
[b]Refunded.[/b]
And I hope Ubisoft learns that slapping a nerdy movie title on a product isn’t enough to milk money from fans.
[b]Boo.[/b]
